In my Womanrune Immersion class with Molly Remer, the Rune a couple of days ago was the Egg.
Rune of naming. Word of Power. Magic Naming. Communication.
The word “naming” stuck with me all day I finally realized that I have been – naming me – for the last few years, and that in naming me I am – claiming me.
I CLAIM ME!
It’s taken me most of my life to claim me, to bring me out of deep hiding. I am the daughter of holocaust survivors, my parents were the only survivors out of their entire families. They each spent five years in concentration camps and I grew up listening to my mother tell me every day of the horrors of concentration camps.
As a young child I didn’t understand the words, their meaning, the heartbreak that each word carried, but I felt and absorbed my mothers pain, her guilt, her tears that ran down her face. I felt her body as she held me on her lap with the horrors she lived through.
As a child, I didn’t know how to process this and so I hid myself away, I hid so far and so deep that I almost didn’t find myself. I was born a year after my parents were liberated. I now know that the purpose I was born for was to give power and light. My parents were so broken, their heart, their spirit, their soul was shattered to pieces but they were able to go on living because of me. I gave them life, I gave them hope, I gave them a reason to go on, I gave them a purpose. And I gave them my power; I gave them the light they needed.
In the last few years I have been re-claiming my light and my power. Slowly I have been digging myself out of hiding and come to know who I am on my own without the holocaust. My parents have both transitioned to Love, they don’t need my power or my light now anymore and I am re-claiming me back.
The holocaust will always be a part of me; it’s my legacy, my history, my ancestry. But, if I stay hidden away I will always be a victim of it and live under it’s ashes.
I need to re-claim ME, to know my passions, my desires, to live in my power and to shine my light.
And so, I’m claiming ME. My power. My light.
How about you? Are you re-claiming yourself from your story? Post your re-claiming of you here, I’d love to know.
© Masha Gitel Ellman 2015